The importance of interpersonal relationships for students !!

11. Many people find interpersonal relationships the most challenging aspect of their personal and/or work lives. How can such relationships be enhanced by the development of emotional intelligence?

There is a saying “No One Is perfect”. Likewise, it is very difficult to have perfect interpersonal relationships among people. But such imperfect interpersonal skills can be enhanced with the development of Emotional Intelligence (EQ). According to Goleman (2004) “EQ is the abilities such as being able to motivate oneself and persist in the face of frustration; to control impulse and delay gratification; to regulate one’s mood and keep distress from swamping the ability to think; to empathize and to hope “(p.34). By developing EQ, problems that university students face in interpersonal relationships can be overcome.

Firstly, as students spend most of their time with the lecturers and friends in campus, clear communication is one of the most important interpersonal skills among students. Students might have disagreements and wrong perceptions due to miscommunication. They think their ways of working are the best and this thought may lead to problems when we need to work in a team. For instance, when we do a group project, every group member has to contribute ideas to complete the job. The conflict starts at this point if a student believes his work is the best while others cannot entirely follow his idea. Soon, he might drop out from the project group. Finally, he could or would not contribute his best effort and his work is not well graded. By adopting EQ such as discussing issues together and having the negotiation skills, expressing anger appropriately without a bad attitude and fighting, students will be able to solve this communication problem (Kaplan, 1996). Students can also be good team members if they are willing to listen to people carefully and has empathy and understand others.

Secondly, students should always clarify whenever they have doubts on their studies. They should also always seek help when they face problems. If they do not communicate with lecturers and tutors or do not have enough friends to clear the doubts, they will get left behind and end up in “failure”. Having a good friend who has aspect of EQ such as patience, concern and consideration will make a student’s life easier as he/she can ask and share his problems and feeling to the friend. (Life – long Earning Interpersonal Skills, n.d) Therefore, all students should try to make more friends. To build good relationships with friends, students should practice to be friendly, adaptable in any community, helpful and democratic in dealing with others. By having more friends; students can count on the friends and can be able to overcome the problem that they face in studies.

The other problem that university students face is stress. Every student has this problem, but with high EQ, students can deal with it. Stress can hinder the abilities of students. Stress reduces thinking and concentration and impairs decision making. Kaplan (May 24, 1996) mentioned that “It leads to forgetfulness and a loss of ability to focus keenly on a task, and it makes students overly sensitive to criticism. Under these conditions, they perform less well and are more upset by their failures”. However, students can overcome this problem if they have good interpersonal skills. A way to reduce the stress is to take time out for enjoyable activities. Participating in some other brief activity that is mentally restful or fun is another way of reducing stress. Moreover, students can spend time with people and share the feelings by setting aside the pressures of school, work, or difficult relationships.

Therefore, I strongly believe that interpersonal skills such as being patient, being able to control anger and stress, having negotiability and understanding minds etc. enable students to work with others harmoniously and efficiently and with that we can achieve our goal.








Goleman, Daniel (2004). Emotional Intelligence why it can matter more than IQ (10th
Anniversary Edition). New York: Banta Dell.

Kaplan, S.L (May 24, 1996). Helping Gifted Students with Stress Management.
Helping Gifted Students with Stress Management. Retrieved October 14, 2007 from
http://www.kidsource.com/kidsource/content/stress_management.html

Life – Long Earning Interpersonal Skills (2004, Sep 24). Match your talents with employers’ expectations.
Interpersonal Skills. Retrieved Oct 14, 2007 from
http://science.uniserve.edu.au/projects/skills/jantrial/interpersonal/interpersonal.htm#page_top

Helping Gifted Students With Stress Management (Summary)

The article is mainly about the effects of stress on students. It also provides how students can cope with the stress and burnout, how parents, teachers and counselors can reduce stress on students.

“Stress is the body's general response to any intense physical, emotional, or mental demand placed on it by oneself or others. While racing to meet a deadline, dealing with a difficult person, or earning a poor grade are all stressful, so are the excitement of playing a lively game of tennis, falling in love, and being selected to join a special program for gifted students.”

Reference:

Kaplan, S. (May 24, 1996). Helping Gifted Students With Stress Management. Retrieved Oct 14,2007, from
http://www.kidsource.com/kidsource/content/stress_management.html

"Runaway Bride"

“Runaway bride” was directed by Gary Marshall and Scott Marshall. It was released in 1999. As Richard Gere and Julia Robert are my favorite actor and actress, I chose “Runaway Bride” for my movie review blog post. We can enjoy both comedy and romance in this movie. The sound tracks and movie scenes of Maryland are wonderful. The scene that I like the best is when Maggie (Robert) was riding the horse in her wedding gown. It is an amazing scene.

Julia Roberts acted as Maggie Carpenter, a woman who ran a family hardware store in the small town of Hale, Maryland. She was known for running away from the wedding three times at last minutes and leaving heart broken grooms behind. It was because she felt that she didn’t love them deeply. Finally, she found the one who knew her very well.

Richard Gere’s role in “Runaway Bride” was USA Today columnist “Ike Graham”. He was told about Maggie and Ike wrote it on the paper. For this inaccurate article, Ike was fired by his editor, his ex-wife (Rita Wilson). In order to get back his job, Ike decided to go to Maggie’s small town to prove his story was true. It was the time Maggie was planning for her 4th marriage. But they two had the same character which was lack of self-understanding. And finally, Maggie and Ike were together and got married.

Though, “Runaway Bride” was not the top American romantic comedy movie, it is nice to watch and is really entertaining.

Problems & Solutions !!

Many people find interpersonal relationships the most challenging aspect of their personal and/or work lives. How can such relationships be enhanced by the development of emotional intelligence?

There is a saying “No One Is perfect” likewise; it is very difficult to have perfect interpersonal relationships among people. However, we, students at a multiracial country like Singapore, can enhance such imperfect interpersonal relationships with the development of Emotional Intelligence. As we all are living in human society, clear communication is one of the most important interpersonal skills. First, sometimes we might have disagreements and wrong perception due to miscommunication. If we can listen to people carefully and have empathy for others; we can solve this problem easily. We should always clarify whenever we have doubts on others’ opinions. Second, impatience can make conflicts occur among us. To avoid conflicts, we must practice to be patient and adopt understanding mind. Thirdly, sometimes, we think our ways of working is the best and this thought may lead to problems when we need to work in a team. By transforming this thought to negotiability and leadership skills, we can perform our tasks well in group. Being able to take responsibility and having self confidence can add to our interpersonal relationships values. Lastly, flexibility or adaptability can make us feel comfortable in any community. As we all speaks different languages and have different cultures in Singapore, we should always be careful in criticism and discrimination on others. Therefore, I strongly believe that interpersonal skills enable us to work with others harmoniously and efficiently and with that we can achieve our goal.

Compare & Contrast

Comparison of the different aspects and/ or degrees of emotional intelligence needed by two different professions between "a doctor and an engineer"

There is no person whose profession is successful without having emotional intelligence. I believe everybody has interpersonal skills except the level of skills he/she has may vary person to person. As everyone has different professions, the emotional intelligence that each person needs is different. For example, the emotional intelligence that needed to have in a doctor and in an engineer is different in many ways though they have few similar points.

No patient sees a doctor without trust and respect. A doctor must also be easy to talk and willing to listen carefully to health care concerns. He also should have interpersonal skills like how to question the patient in order to diagnose and make the right medical judgment for the patient.

As for an engineer, he needs to have good communication skills to present his innovative designs or creativity to his customers or client. He must be able to integrate his ideas with surrounding influences and business objectives. The good leadership, influential and negotiability skills are also important for an engineer.

Both a doctor and an engineer should be respectful and trusted by their patients and client but in different ways. An engineer is to be a good project planner while a doctor is a fast decision maker to cure his emergency patient. Teamwork, ability of being able to control stress and time management play important roles for both doctor and engineer too. Lastly, commitment and interest are essential facts for an engineer and doctors to be successful.


References:

http://www.harrisinteractive.com/news/allnewsbydate.asp?NewsID=850

http://www.auxiliumtraining.com/essential_skills_2day.htm

My Life's Meaning

Everybody has a different concept for “the meaning of life”. The meaning may vary depending on individual’s thought. Some believe it is success. For me, life is full of changes and I am learning and getting experiences from those changes. So far from my experiences that I have learnt, I found out that life never goes in a form of a straight line. It is more like a sine curve, with its ups and downs. However, life does not have the upper and lower limits like the sine curve. Along the curve, we may have enjoyable, meaningful and happy times. Of course, horrible, sad and terrible times do happen too. Nothing is stable and lasts forever. The only thing we can do is trying to live as happily and perfectly as we can. We’d better avoid being depressed or upset while we are faced with the problems and difficulties. Just remember the word “changing”. It always brings a relief for me.

Another life’s meaning of mine is “believes”. Everyone should have his/her own belief. Having a belief in something can make us feel safer and warmer, I believe. It could be a religion, a person, a theory or a subject. We should always have something to count on in lives. For me, I believe in my religion and my parents. I will continue learning and living the rest of my life meaningfully with my beliefs and the changes which I will face in future.

Hi hi !!

This Is Nang & Nice To See You All :)

I Wish I Could Perform Well In This EG1471 Module...